I feel tossed.
From here to there, I’m stumbling, carrying all these cares, don’t think I’m going nowhere, and maybe… oh just maybe ill get there.

I’ve changed my mind again.
Technology mocks me. Each day I get a notification reminding me to check Time Hop, this app which allows me to see where I was on this day via social media.
There I was, one year ago, moving into mimis. (My grandmother’s, who would have thought?)
Here I am, a year later, displaced again. What now?

Four years ago I moved out for the first time. Out of a small town, into the “city,” this small southern historical destination I can’t seem to get out of.
Sweet like sugar, sticky sweet treat.

And now, here I am…
Deciding to move… Where? Not out or beyond but BACK
This is my life, saying goodbye and scrambling back because I forgot something…
something important

I left something in this town, small home town deep south. I left a part of me that I’ve discovered, uncovered in the dirt that roots my soul,
Oh sweet sweet Ebenezer.
You are a rock

And now, back to the town I can’t shake off. But I feel it. I told my Mimi and she felt it too. I’m strained, stretched between place to place,
Just need some space
MY space

In the middle.
I’ve been growing. Finally rooted. A Spanish oak twisting to the sky,
Moving back,
I’vee been building for this, preparing myself.

I am ready.


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